The new pastor arrives, spending the first several months settling in. One of the biggest concerns is a long-serving associate; no matter hard much instruction and coaching the new pastor gives, he can’t seem to bring the associate into an effective and productive place of ministry. Clearly, the associates’ present role is not a good ministry fit. Finally, in frustration, he goes back to his board, declaring, “I’m sorry, I can’t work with this guy. Can you tell me what you were thinking when you reinstated him for three more years just before my arrival?” Each board member proceeds to relate how the associate has historically been impossible to deal. After each person has had their say, without one positive comment, the question is asked, “Why did you call him for another three years?” “Well” came the response, “he has a family to feed and he’s got to do something….” In short, this was just another case of the culture of nice. It’s a difficult decision and frankly, nobody wants to be the “not nice” person who has to show him the door.

We are the church; we’re the body of Christ and we’re nice. If you didn’t know better, you’d think that the Fruit of the Spirit is “nice; nice; and nicer.” After all, Jesus was a nice man; Jesus always did what everybody wanted. Jesus went about being nice. Not at all! Jesus frequently disappointed people who wanted him to be King; who stated that they would never allow him to be handed over to be killed; who wanted him to redeem Israel from the Romans. In each case, Jesus was anything but nice. In fact, when it came to his mission, Jesus was anything but wish-washy stating, “My food is to do the will of the One who sent me.”

The culture of nice can pervade our fellowships. It’s a culture that permits ungifted individuals to remain in places of ministry in which they don’t belong; it prevents us from correcting and confronting one another when someone is clearly out of line; it forces pastors to be there for everyone in the congregation because “that’s what we pay them for.” Nice will be the death of the God’s people if we’re not careful.

Consider Acts 6. Luke is detailing how the church grew. The story of the widows appears. Is looking after widows biblical? Is caring for widows a good thing? Of course it is but the twelve put their foot down and declare, “It would not be right for us to neglect the teaching of God’s Word”. In the end, they appoint seven good men to fulfil this role. Do you see what happened? The church continues to grow because the Apostles didn’t allow “nice” to get in the way of Christ’s vision as laid out in Acts 1:8. The church grew because it overcame “nice”.

As someone who has been accused of not being nice, it’s not a title I relish. But the alternative of wasting people’s time and energies while allowing the work of ministry to flounder was something that compelled me even more. Don’t get me wrong, I have nothing against being nice; however, sometimes it’s a choice between nice and being effective and missional, I know which one I will choose. Can you say the same?